Just Fuck Already

It’s currently 11 p.m. and I’m writing this from bed. My alarm is set for 5:30, which is when I’ll get up and start taking care of the work I probably should have got done today except I got distracted.

As usual, I was nearly falling asleep when I got home from my meeting, but now that I’ve brushed my teeth and am actually under the covers, I got nothing. It might be because the character in my audiobook is quite possibly about to bone the dude he’s been exchanging longing glances with for the better part of ten hours. Or it could just be because my body hates me.

No one will ever know.

Seriously, though, ten hours should constitute as cruel and unusual punishment. I’m getting blue eyeballs over here. Let a girl catch her breath, okay?

Oh, I just fell asleep a little. Gotta grab this star by the tail and hang the fuck on. Ooh, I did it again. Prognosis good, captain.

Editor’s Note: Yes, I realize that I would have blue earballs as opposed to eyeballs since this is an audiobook and is therefore consumed auditorialy as opposed to visually. I even woke up in the middle of the night filled with the realization that I had mistyped. But I was too tired to correct it. Forgive me.