I pulled this off of the freestyle thread on the Keith and the Girl forums. Just in case it gets deleted. Many are cheesy and only relevent to the post and/or day that they were made on, but I like them so I’m not changing a thing.

This thread is awesome opossum, and all the other animals.
I think my rymes are fine, you know marina brings the lolz.
I was just jerkin my gerkin, over a the youporn thread
I like it when they work the shaft and then suck on the head
You people know I’m go and all the lights are green
this shit is mad and bad, here at the katg scene.

I used the word thread twice, at least I didn’t try to rhyme it with itself. I didn’t even realize til just now

You have to make it rhyme, like this:

I’m totally addicted to the KATG Forums
My man says he is leaving,
And you know I just ignore him
It’s okay though, while I’m still breathing
he may be angry, he may be seething
But I am the one
Who makes it so fun
To live and Die in Anaheim
‘Cause I am his and he is mine
True love geek style,
I think that maybe, you just got pnowed
I gotta find my baby, so we can bone
Pre-marital victory sex, I do condone.

I agree with be leaves
just give me some of these…
Islamic titties

Allah ack-bar
Give me some more

Girls who wear lipstick
Under their Niqabb
Are girls who work dipsticks
Like it’s thier night-job

Give me rebels
Shi-ite and Suni
This white devil
Loves Eastern Booty

Just Kidding you guys
I’m straight, and not white
I don’t give one clean fuck
about other girls head-lights
I just wondered if I had good luck
Rhyming about islam, boobs and such.

Now I know that you’re feelin’ me
Although I think that moonrose is for peace
And not for Bin Ladin,
That stupid hot-head
That man just needs to get laid
72 vigins is no way to get paid
Christian, Muslim, Jewish or other
Can’t we all be sisters and brothers?
Life is too short
Tell your cohorts
Blowing yourself up
Will not spread love
Where’s that white dove?
Time to rise above
Well that’s all I got
This is my seceret plot
To turn freestyle battle
Into the Freestyle peace talks

Kirstin Dunst?
Oh, fuck that cunt!

As for this being the united nations
With you I’ll have to have some patience
Besides America, the Iraq and the Asians
On these forums, we have people from all places
You sir, are canadian,
To my country you are alien
Over here we’ve got the Duchies
To the south you’ll see the Kiwis
Look around at all these countries
That are gathered in this place.
We have members from every race
Saint Marcos, it’s time to embrace
The truth and it is this:
Next time you try to dis
This particular “princess”
Realize this shit
There is something I don’t need
And that is to be mean
Cruelty is for weenies
Who think that they impede
me with their screaming
when really they don’t see,
They’re up against a Queen.

I think you see now that in so-cal this is how we wow the crowd
Marina has beat ya at this creature and you thought you had it down

Sorry to say friend, I’m not some egg-head
I read the news and, I’ve had to count the dead
I feel like this shit has got to end
When are we going to send
Our children to college
Instead of through carnage?
How much is too much?
To see young bucks in crutches
Missing legs, pissin’ blades
Youth laid waste is too much to pay
For someone else’s voracious rapacious
Racist-assed monopolies.
These “rap atrocities”
are not anomalies.
You are being contradictory
Please get straight with me
What is it you believe?

That shit’s pretty long
for a fucking swan song
Man, that was a neutron bomb

I’m coming at you like IEDs
When you’re done with me
You’ll remember these:

Thou whilst not spit game that, while rhyming makes no sense
Thou shalt not dis men who have bad timing but good concepts
Thou would not incense me by incessant whining and not being honest

You are not the shit,
In fact, you’re a bitch

These are the commandments
I have to demand this
From n00bs who need practice
Do me a favor and take this poultice:
Come back after solstice
When you can do something besides take a piss.

Thank you G3 for your suggestion of solstice as a rhyme for practice.