This is Why We Should Eat Sushi Every Night

So, last night sweet boyfriend Ben and I went to Kula Revolving Sushi Bar, where there is always at least a 30 minute wait, even on a Thursday, because this is how good this shit is. We each ate about $30.00 worth of raw fish and rice and came home full and happy and went to bed.

Maybe it’s just the fish, or maybe it’s the mercury leaching into my brain, but I had the craziest dream, and now I’m going to tell you about it.

So, in my dream, Big Ben was a female to male transsexual. I actually had dream memories of him as a girl in high school. I also had dream memories that he’d come out as transgender after moving to New York and started transition there. The setting of the dream was a massive rager-style party he was throwing as a sort of coming out party, even though everybody already knew because of facebook.

The house that was supposed to be his parent’s house here in LA was actually the childhood home of one of my middle school best friends, Heather Brown, except the dream house was bigger and fancier. And there was weed everywhere. There were gallon zip-locks of shitty stress in every conceivable hiding place. In middle school best friend Heather’s real life childhood home, there was this little house in the back yard that was actually a sort of fort situation, but in the dream house it was a man-cave of sorts with hard wood floors, massive sound system, comfy chairs and gold records on the walls. Why gold records, I do not know. At one point, we were walking from one house to the other, and Big Ben stopped at a lawnmower, took the clipping bag off the mower, reached in the bag and pulled out, like, the third gallon zip of weed of the evening.

In the dream party, I eventually left the little house and went into the main house to use the restroom. In the bathroom, I saw B. Ben’s best friend Charles’ roommate De’Shean, Charles’ boyfriend Darren, and our friend from way back DJ, all buck-ass naked and dancing in the shower. Not just dancing, but synchronized dancing. Then I looked over and saw my co-worker Brandon shaving in the mirror as if nothing was weird.

Then I woke up.

Oh, and dream Big Ben had one of those fashion beards, where every hair is only about a millimeter long and there’s no raggedy edges and it’s kind of doll-like. But the ladies at the party must have loved that shit because they were on him like sun on Sahara.

In the morning, this text exchange happened:

Me: Last night I had a dream that you were a female to male transsexual. Also, DJ was taking showers with De’Shean and Darren.

B. Ben: Did you know I was a transsexual all along, or did I whip out my vag and surprise you?

My friends rule.