Sick Day
Blog truncated on account of stomach ache.
Category: Writing
A List of Today’s Events
In case we’re not facebook friends, here’s some stuff that happened to me today: I was interviewed on Slate I got a new tattoo I...
When Everything Goes Right
Yesterday’s work stopped this morning at 1am, today’s work started this morning at 8am. I ate breakfast at 11 am, and dinner at 9pm. No...
The Fear of Men
“Do you like living in this house?” I nodded, too busy crying to say anything intelligible. Even so, it was a lie. I hated living...
And I’m Still Glad You’re Dead
People told me that I should make up with the grandfather that beat me when I was a kid. “You’ll regret it when he’s dead.”...
Kicking Ass and Drinking Male Tears
I’ve been watching and loving Agent Carter like crazy. She’s an unmitigated badass. Although I do wish she had more screen time with other ladies....
Ben and Marina Answer 15 Honest Questions
Ben found this article about 15 honest questions the person you marry should be able to answer. We don’t really believe in the sanctity of...
When You’re Strange
It’s nearly one in the morning, I have work stuff to do pretty early tomorrow, so this is going to be quick. Today was Ben...
Selfie Progression
Sturdy Thirty
I am now 30 years old. I’m just surprised I didn’t suffer from birthday depression, although it seems like I haven’t had a proper birthday...
Quiz: Is Your Toast Game On Point?
1. Do you like toast? 3. Do you make toast? 2. Do you like the toast you make? Use the key below to calculate your...
Stop Telling People They Deserve to Be Happy
I am so tired of people telling other people they deserve stuff. You know what you deserve? Exactly what you have. The truth is, if...
Things I know about Elf on a Shelf
Every Christmas this Elf on a Shelf trend gets bigger and bigger and I don’t get it at all. In an attempt to understand, I...
Three True Facts About the Public Library
I was talking to friend Charles today and our conversation reminded me about the nine horrible months I spent working at the public library. I...
Stop Saying Charli Hebdo is About Free Speech
This morning, 12 people were murdered at the headquarters of the satirical magazine Charlie Hebdo in Paris. Since then, the world has gone frantic with...
Good News: God Says You’re Fine
I just wanted to let you know that I have been contacted by the Lord, our God, and this is what they said: GOD’S LOVE...
We Had a Long Day
First full work day of the new year wore us out. However, please do notice that I have formally separated the erotica reviews from the...
Because Rich People Think Jail is Fun
This is one of those posts I’ll write but not publish for six months. Because, of course, none of this actually happened and it is...
2014 – Year in Review
It’s become a tradition on the blog that I post something of an annual review at the close of the year. Here is 2012, and...
Hell is for Children – We’re Raising Our Kids Wrong
We often think of the concept of a mother’s love as being an immutable force of nature that no earthly power could overcome, and yet,...
I Threw Up This Morning
So this is going to be short. I still only feel about 78% human, despite spending the entire day in bed watching back to back...
How not to write about minority characters
Minority consumers have heard every lame excuse in the book for monoculture creators to make up for their constant and recurring failure to including us....
Diamond Ads
Are fucking stupid.
Christmas Eve Eve
Sounds like a brand of douche sold exclusively at The 99 Cent Store. It would be pine scented. Of course. Fun fact: In the last...
12:13 AM
I started reading this book as research for Jake and Jessica. Deliciois, tantalizing research. As you can see, I’m nearly halfway through and absolutely enjoying...
Currently Reading
On the recommendation of friend Charles. It has been advertised as being chock full of fat, ethnnic femme goodness.
Wherin I Watch Honky Monstrosity “Devious Maids”
I saw a trailer for the Lifetime Original show Devious Maids, which seems to be some sort of social experiment regarding how many degrading outfits...
What.
It’s after one am. I have absolutely nothing to say. I haven’t had anything to say for two weeks. I’m ass deep in this new...
So you have an ethnic partner…
Tips and tricks for keeping and caring for your whiteness-challenged loved one. An angry Mexican rant.* 1. Their culture is not “cool.” Don’t start buying...
Don’t Eat This Stuff
It’s super gross. You know how some extremely artificial foods just taste like a pile of weird chemicals? This is like that, but not good....
Business Crying
Just had my quarterly melt-down, right on schedule. Tears and everything. For no earthly reason. Well.. except unbearable stress. — Marina Rose Martinez (@Marinaisgo) December...
All I Want Are Days Like This
Working by yourself, you frequently feel like you're vomiting your heart into a vacuum. Today was not like that. Today was good. — Marina Rose...
Step 1: Take a Vine. Step 2: ??? Step 3: $$$
Short answer: No. Long answer: Kind of. Vine, like any other avenue to your end user/customer/client/what-have-you can be used to leverage your brand, which will...
Biological Determinist Shirts
For those who don’t know or who have forgotten: First of all, biological determinism suggests a level of knowledge we don’t currently have about humanity...
I’m Back, Bitches!
There were no posts on Tuesday or Wednesday because my hosting company, Lunar Pages took a huge fat dump all over my face and tits....
Why Twitter is Better than Facebook
I would agree that dumb clickbait articles are counter-productive in social media networks where the stated purpose of those networks is to foster genuine connection...
“I have been throwing up since I started running.”
I know, I know, I’m on vacation, but I can’t fucking sit here at the beach anymore while this is happening in the real world....
How to Blog on Vacation
I’m sitting at my office desk on Saturday before my vacation, writing this so that it will publish next Tuesday as if I were here...
Canadians Walk Like This 0-|<
The problem with living in the Pacific Northwest is that I just can’t pick the Canadians out of a crowd like I could in LA....
Cinco de Stinko
Some Mexicans get annoyed that white people love Cinco de Mayo. That would be like the Irish getting mad that everybody celebrates St. Patrick’s Day....
Everyone is Fighting Their Own Battle
In my business, I do a lot of cold calling. It’s the cheapest, fastest way to get clients, but about 50% of the receptionists I...
Which phrase would be engraved in your grave stone if you had to choose it from the last song you heard?
It’s either Generator ^ First Floor by the Freelance Whales Or Lord Knows by Tupac Such complex. Much diversity. What’s yours? Leave it in the...
When nothing goes wrong
Him: “It’s only been a few days.” Me: “It’s been two years.” I’m so tired of my work. I take so much time and effort...
My Me Time is Sacred
I have spent almost the entire day naked in bed mainlining Buffy. No regrets.
Dragon Age Inquisition: Early Access
Thanks to the wonder of EA’s Early Access, you are reading the blog of someone who has played Dragon Age: Inquisition. The first thing I...
Jake and Jessica and Transgender Sex
Jake and Jessica fans may want to pay special attention to this rant, although it may be of interest to any and all of you,...
No Response
I took a part time job to try and steady out my revenue stream pay my fucking bills. The idea is, this way I won’t...
My Neighbor’s Alarm Goes Off at Five AM
And if I’m already having trouble sleeping, I can hear it through the wall. Basically, when insomnia hits, the alarm is there to add insult...
Organizational Love Triangle
In the last month, I have conceived of, and partially executed the creation of two organizations other than my own personal brand. Both of them...
Eat and Grow Fat: How to Be Happy
The thing about being insecure and unhappy, is that’s not a conditional reality. If you’re insecure and unhappy, you’re going to be insecure and unhappy...