So I decided to take a part time position as a local organizer, and today was my first day. I’m totally exhausted. I still have the digital engagement consultancy and the tour as my primary businesses. I’ve brought on help for both so that nothing gets dropped or left behind while I’m off playing house, but it’s an interesting case.
The position was basically too cool to stay away from, so I went forward with the application and interview process, and now I’m really excited to get to work with a team again, but I’m also looking at the enormity of what I’ve signed on for.
I definitely never thought I’d be an employee again, and I admit that the times I’ve applied for employee positions in the past were not out of the best intentions, but this one was kind of a perfect storm.
My business life is going really well, I’m managing a steady stream of projects from a diverse portfolio of clients, I feel really good about that, and then in the middle of this, a paid position doing basically what I do for fun anyway just appears out of nowhere.
I feel like this is either going to expand my horizons and facilitate growth, or it’s going to distract me and I’ll have to make a painful choice between the future of my business and a job I could probably do and enjoy without all the added stress of dual business ownership, but with the uniquely horrible stress of not being in charge of things.
After nearly three years of trying (and actually mostly succeeding) to generate my own steam as a freelancer, not to mention the years I spent before that chasing my own tail, desperate to launch something, anything in order to give myself some kind of trajectory, I feel really comfortable with my professional competency. I also feel like it’s easy to isolate when work is good and not reach out to a community. It’s also easy to isolate when business is bad, and that was my problem this time last year, but the circumstances have really changed.
When this happens, I get navel-gazey and I don’t have the influx of fresh newness to sustain my creativity. So, hopefully this position will be my creative pool, my clients will benefit from my insight, and the tour can almost run itself as soon as it starts to make any money at all, which is actually becoming a real and true thing as Halloween approaches.
Basically, I’m feeling excited and apprehensive at a 2 to 1 ratio, which is really my preferred emotional state. Feel free to congratulate me.