I guess I’m on a blogging kick.
Anyway, I thought I’d write about the rain because that’s what’s going on and I’m anything if not accurate. So… it’s raining. And… stuff.
I don’t know what to write about except that the rain makes me think it’s later than it is because there’s not enough light to justify it being daytime and I just feel like it’s elementary school, because in elementary school when it rained we didn’t go outside to play, we stayed in the classroom for recess. And really, which fat, socially awkward kid with no friends doesn’t positively love staying inside where everybody in the class has to at least play near you, if not actually with you? Outside is dirty, and requires -yech- running, and worse yet–the kids are all spread out, away from teacher earshot so they can call you a whale and nobody knows but you and every other kid around, who will never, ever let that go. Until somebody says that you look like a dude and are probably an it–which will automatically become your new, hermaphrodite nickname. So rain was awesome, because we all had to sit quietly and play nice and nobody could suggest that I might be better off dead for at least one whole day.
But in middle school and high school it was totally different. Since I started taking public transportation in 7th grade, waiting and walking in the rain, then being packed onto the bus with several people that smelled like wet, diseased dog wasn’t really my idea of awesome. Especially when I recall that my shoes were frequently falling apart, and that my pant legs were always dragging on the ground due to the fact that I perceived big baggy jeans to be the height of fashion. An image choice which eventually became my standard high school sagging dickies. Either way, those fuckers drag on the wet ground and in puddles, and usually, by the time I got to school or home from school everything below my knees was soaked through, due in no small part to the fact that in LA, the drainage system backs-up in the rain and everything floods. I also never carried an umbrella because 1. umbrellas are stupid and 2. Umbrella’s just drip water all over the bus, giving you the same problem except indoors. Long story short, I never had good rain gear, because why would you go out and spend the money for something that happens 5 times a year? And as a result, rain sucked because I was cold and wet the entire time.
So this is really extra long and all I wanted to do was waste a few minutes writing about the rain. And now I’m thinking about all my old clothes and all my old shoes, and taking the bus in high school, and standing in the pouring rain, wishing I could smoke but knowing not to chance it. And all the other little things I hated about being young and angry and poor. And now the rain just makes me feel young and tired and contemplative.
