I’m at Ben’s house using the internet because I don’t have it at my house anymore, which makes it a little hard, but not that much more than usual. I’m freaking out a little because I have to find a new place to live in two months, and I think that the person I was talking to about moving in with either hates me or is scared of me, which is never a good sign.
Anyway, I have a paper due on Wednesday and a paper due Thursday, and next week is finals week, but I’ve just been dicking around on the internet because I don’t know where to start on either one of them. The end of the semester is so close that it’s almost inconceivable that there’s still more work to do.
I’m tired, and I feel kinda like everything I have is just precariously perched on a pin point and that it could come toppling down at any second, but it’s been like that for so long that I’m starting to get used to it, and I don’t panic anymore. Other than that, my life is just so good. I’m always trying to get this or that done, or figure out a way for shit to work that I forget how happy I am, and how much I have. Last night me and a bunch of my friends hung out in the cold and played ten fingers and laughed, and when we were leaving I was next to my friend DJ in the going straight ahead lane, and he was in the left turn lane, and we were making faces at each other, and when the left turn light came on, he was still making faces and carrying on, and me and mary, (who was in my car), tried to tell him to go, he just got more outrageous with the face-making, finally, when the light turned yellow, he realized what was happening and backed straight into Tony’s car behind him. There was no damage, but it so fucking random and so funny.
I had a dream that my car was burred in a pile of little tiny flowers, and I remember when I was sifting through them to get to it, there was the most enveloping scent of roses and magnolia blossoms coming from those little buds, I just felt so good all over everywhere.