I am going to Arizona tomorrow night with Mike and Jono and it’s going to kick so much ass that I’ll probably die there and have to be cremated because my head exploded form the kick-assedness.

Also, I read Paul Amanda and Ramsey’s journals so I’ll hop on the embarrassed bandwagon as well.
-When I was 13 I went to Italy with my entire 8th grade class, and there happened to be a civil war and there was a point where the rebel army was threatening to take over the town we were about to drive into so we had to stop the bus and wait. Long story short, we had to wait so fucking long that I pissed my pants. It sucked.
-I puked on my physician once, but it was more funny than embarrassing because he was offering me anti-depressants at the time because he didn’t believe that I had the flu.
-I can read and walk at the same time, but when I was learning this, I ran into several poles.
-In sixth grade, I thought I was hot shit until my teacher informed me that she could see my grandma underwear sticking out the bottom on my shorts.
-When I was little, I used to put a towel on my head and run around the house naked, yelling “look, I’m a nun!!”.
-Sometimes I still do the nun thing, but only when Ben is there to laugh at me.
-When Ben and I were first going out, I asked him to fuck me and he wouldn’t. That’s hella embarrassing, but it turns out he’s gay. (no, he’s not, I’m just hideously ugly).
-When I was a toddler, I used to eat dog food. The dry kind, the wet kind smelled too bad.