Public Service Announcement: Apartment Living

This morning I met our new neighbors. At 4:00 a.m., while wearing pajamas and standing in my own driveway and staring at them in their kitchen. Our conversation went something like this:

Me: “I can hear you in my bedroom”
“Oh sorry, well close the window”
Me: “Thanks”

Since my neighborhood seems to be on the edge of gentrification, I’ve noticed that there are a few new people who have never lived in apartments before. Rule number one of apartment living: EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU, SO SHUT FUCKING UP.

It’s not shameful to have never lived in the same building as all your neighbors, but there are some things a person has to take into consideration. Mostly that EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU, SO SHUT FUCKING UP.

So, new neighbors all over the world, if you’ve just moved into your first apartment, welcome to the community, and remember that everyone can hear you….(say it with me now.)

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