Books I Couldn’t Finish in 2013 – C through Fi

the-colour-of-magic-1THE COLOUR OF MAGIC – Discworld Book 1 by Terry Pratchett

I got this in some crazy Audible sale where it was free, or came free with another book, I can’t remember. As far as I can tell, you can’t buy a digital version through Amazon, although it is still available on Audible itself.

The book starts out with a shaming rant personally requested bu the author himself about copyright infringement that is meant to discourage me from copying millionaire Terry Pratchett’s valuable intellectual property for my friends. This is basically the digital equivalent of a paper book spending 20 initial pages on a trist against lending. Don’t worry, I’ll never recommend this poorly recorded piece of S to anybody I know. The background hum alone is enough to give the dead tinnitus.

After the angry grandpa lecture I PAID TO HEAR (not much, but it still counts), the book itself tries to be silly(?) but winds up being tedious. Oh, hahaha, a rich tourist who doesn’t know anything, he’s a naive dummy and everyone else is an incompetent douche and/or a swindler. Look how wacky their whole entire world is. It sits on top of a turtle! Don’t. Care.

die_tryingDIE TRYING – Jack Reacher Book 2 by Lee Child

I listened to the fist Jack Reacher book, Killing Floor, after seeing the underwhelming Tom Cruise movie last year and thinking that the book would most definitely be better than that. And it was. I was able to overlook the terrible misogyny owing to the fact that there were only one or two ladies in the whole thing, and they didn’t do or say much. But in this book, Jack is handcuffed to a lady. And not just any lady, a bossy, shrewish FBI agent lady who really doesn’t know her place. And probably needs to be taught.

I am not interested in being subjected to a will-they won’t-they rape situation. I know they exist, I just can’t have that that being a condition of the tension. It makes me too nervous.

The-Fault-of-Our-StarsTHE FAULT IN OUR STARS by John Green

Me being a massive fan of John Green’s YouTube channel, you’d think I’d read more than 0.5 of his books. But you’d be wrong. Well… technically you’d be right. I did read half of this book and all of Will Grayson Will Grayson, which was only half written by John. So I guess you could attribute an entire book’s worth of reading to me, although not in the usual sense.

Anyway, the reason I stopped reading this is because it’s about a girl who is dying of cancer. I know, you’re probably thinking that I should have read the description. But I did. I thought I could handle it, and I couldn’t.

I just couldn’t.

Fisher-Boy-The-Low-Res-cover-173x276THE FISHER BOY by Stephen Anable

This seemed like it would be right up my alley: Gay protagonist fights against the system with the help of his rag tag band of misfit artist friends in an idealistic beach community during the summer. Instead: overly fancy narrator tirelessly articulates difficult and overly wrought descriptions until you get bored and give up the ghost.

2 Replies to “Books I Couldn’t Finish in 2013 – C through Fi

  1. I love Terry Pratchett but I do agree that ‘the colour of magic’ is not a particularly great example of his Discworld novels, I think it took him a few books to get the hang of it. And I can imagine shitty audio quality doesn’t help.
    If you generally don’t enjoy a lot of silliness in your books he is not for you but let me know if you want a recommendation 🙂

    1. I enjoy silliness, but I don’t enjoy British silliness. I tried to re-read The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy awhile ago, and I just could not stand it.

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